My Panic Attack Story

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Emergency Room Panic Attack

November 1st, 2010 was the day my life changed forever. I had THE panic attack of all panic attacks. This is the one that landed me in the ER; the one I could not recover from. After THIS panic attack, I was literally shaking and crying for months afterwards, waking up in the middle of the night, gasping for air and desperately wondering what was wrong with me.

I Did Not Know it Was Anxiety or Panic

Of course at the time I did not know it was a panic attack and unfortunately for me, neither did anyone else! It also did not end. I call it a perpetual panic attack because I was in a state of panic every day, all day, for months afterwards. It was an incredibly difficult, lonely and frightening experience.

Am I Doing the Right Thing Taking Medication?

The journey to just becoming functional, was long. I doubted every decision I made, unsure if I was doing the right thing to “fix” my situation. Everything I read on the internet was about NOT taking medication. Well, unfortunately an anxiety disorder is one of those conditions where there does not exist a perfect, one size fits all solution. At that time, nobody understood what I was feeling and NOTHING I did was working. I had a job, a husband and children and needed a solution fast. The only thing that worked was medication!

I Want to Help

I know it sounds cliché, but once I was better, I decided I would help anyone I could that might be experiencing similar symptoms and sensations. I would not wish what I felt physically, emotionally and mentally, on anyone. The hardest part was not knowing what it was or how to fix it and then having to be ok with taking medication. I decided to write my story in great detail in hopes that others who might be going through the same thing, might read my story and think “that is exactly what I am going through” or “it’s ok to take medication!”

You are Worth Living a Life Without Fear

I know exactly what you are going through and how hopeless you might be feeling. An anxiety disorder is not easy to control. There is no one solution and it is frustrating. With time and some trial and error with different techniques and medication, you WILL feel better! Do not give up on yourself! Do not feel bad about taking medication! You are worth having a GREAT life, without fear of doing the things you need to do, or want to do.

Please read my upcoming posts, as I will be sharing every last detail:

  • Years of not knowing I had an anxiety disorder
  • Years trying to figure out what was “wrong” with me
  • Finally knowing I had an anxiety disorder, but not knowing what to do about it
    • General Anxiety
    • Panic Attacks
    • Agoraphobia
    • Tics
  • My battle with medication
  • Surrendering, accepting and living my best life!

I am not a doctor. I am simply a person, a mom, a wife, working in corporate America, living a great life with an anxiety disorder, sharing my story. I truly hope it helps.

Ainel Varona

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Continue reading more about me: About Me

or go straight to my Blog: Health History

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